In the last blog post, I shared monetizing creatively or making money with creativity. In this episode, I’ll talk a little more about money.
Estimated reading time: 8 minutes
Why do women wonder about money? Why do even wise women wonder about it? What’s the problem with the money talk we do with our kids, our girls? What needs to change? That’s the question. My friend Sahithya asked; she’s a podcaster at Awkward conversations with my Amma and one of my teammates at team three. Did I tell you we have a name? It’s called Wonder Women. Yes. I know it’s a bit Marvel comics-inspired. Not a little, but a lot, but being a mommy, a doctor, and now a podcaster, I know how much it takes to do all these.
So all these incredible women I’m working with genuinely wonder women.
What Sahithya asked me
How do you think how we talk to women about money needs to change? Not just women, but also girls, females, children, just anyone. How do you think how we talk about money to women needs to change?
My Answer:
Thank you Sahithya, for asking me this question. I firmly believe that everyone needs to have a money talk early on in their life. Women understand money more than men in some ways. When we were young, my mom made the monthly budgets. She maintained a perfect reign on expenses, which helped me learn early money management.
As a teenager, I tried to actively earn by giving tuition and saving from that money. So it’s not only the talk but also the walk that the parents need to do that is sow early saving habits, and show them how to do it. Not just when it’s difficult, and you need the money but also otherwise.
I understand each family has a different way of handling money. The more transparent and inclusive the parents are about earnings expenditure savings, both long and short term.
The better it is. You might even say, I believe women need to read J.L Collins’s book, The Simple path to wealth. Women in India need more flexible work options, especially after becoming moms. Otherwise, the many dreams of financial independence get broken. The reality is a shock. So that talk also needs to be done early.
Choose your career path very carefully so that you do have options. Most women, after becoming moms, struggle with their careers. There is data from all over the world that this is worse now. During the COVID-19 pandemic, women, as natural caregivers, found sacrifice somehow comes easier. So early on, women need to have multiple options to earn. That’s a talk their parents should do first for that.
Crucial is you have a good education. Having an internship at your chosen career before choosing that career can really help women make the right choice. Learning and teaching aimed at entrepreneurship can help women in the long run. So learning to be a maker rather than just a consumer and really change the game for women in India, teaching the value of money is different.
That’s why? Because we have what twisted psychology towards it. If you have grown up in a middle-class family who have obviously heard the talk about living, honestly and comfortably. You don’t really need a lot of money, right? Poverty is glorified, and poverty and honesty seem to go together. That’s what even Bollywood movie says.While wealth and dishonesty are supposed to be best friends. That’s a big mind block right at the root that stops people from making or saving money.
The mechanism is so ingrained that people spend money on unnecessary items to block their growth. This continues to go back to that relaxed state of just enough money. So talk with your daughter that wealth can also be earned, honestly. Mind blocks for making and saving money are not helpful.
For teaching children about money,we should start from childhood. What we teach now will influence them forever and shape their lives. Money is energy and is a means to water; money, advice, and lessons will depend on the child’s age and your relationship with money.
Money is energy, not really in the science sense, but it gives you the ability to do stuff. It’s actually a means to barter. When people give you an effective service, we pay by giving money.
Money should be exchanged in this way so that the balance is maintained. Saving money is very important, but so is earning more. But to make more, the value you provide with the product/service needs to be increased, many folds. That’s why you need to study hard and develop a valuable skill to help others and support yourself, spending money on unnecessary things, which you don’t want to play with after one day.
Save your pocket money to buy things you will enjoy for a long time. The extra pocket money will mean extra chores around the house. My daughter is nine now and she helps me with making beds, managing the books, tidying up her own stuff, keeping track of our own things actually help a lot.
You can always give work according to age, doing the housework right is important for all kids, home management, money management, and also the value of.
That is basically three birds with one stone. I also tell my daughter to help others be self-sufficient lending, or borrowing money between friends should always be discussed with parents or your spouse. Keeping a little bit of your pocket money in the piggy bank will always help you on a rainy day. You need a little.
As you spend less than what you own when you take care of your present, your future will always be rosy hearing my answer.
Sahithya had another question.
My next question to you is what are three things? Every woman needs to discuss with her partner or fiancee about money and finances before entering into a relationship or marriage or engagement.
My Answer
Money is a crucial link to any relationship. And it’s often considered a taboo subject. It’s not roached in the initial stages, especially if someone’s entering into an arrange manager more often than not even a love manage. And it leads to a lot of problems later on. So do you have any suggestions and tips there?
Money talk and new relationships may not go well together, but if you can talk about money comfortably with somebody, that’s a friend, you need to keep close to you. I can’t really tell you what to ask because Indian’s talk money, privately. Each family has different money realities. What you ask will depend on your partner and the kind of relationship you share.
And what the other person answers will depend on his or her. But if he is transparent about talking about money, that’s usually a good signal. So I’m sharing what I asked my spouse. When we were talking about settling down together. One of the first questions I asked him was what are your plans for your career for the next five years?
What he said about his goals, his visions for himself about taking me along with him on journeys, and about finding that middle ground, so that we could work together made me convinced that this was about. You have to understand whether you can walk the path alongside your partner, whether his goals leave you behind.
If they don’t, leave you behind, but embrace your dreams and realities, then that’s a person you need to hold on to tight.
The next question I had asked was what are your thoughts on credit card and loans? Do you have any outstanding liabilities that I should know about? Because you don’t really marry a person(though that’s the biggest myth), you actually marry all his family members, his troubles, his thoughts, his dreams, his vices and everything that goes with them.
So asking these questions upfront helps make you more prepared down the line. Fewer loans, liabilities credit card debts mean, you are free to plan your future with your partner better.
Now, the question I had asked was “when do you think one should start saving in their career?” For me, the answer is simple. As soon as possible start your Public Providence funds. Get your insurance policies, get your health insurance, your life insurance, and any other insurance you feel necessary for a good life . Get it on time as early as possible, because then the premiums are lower, stay healthy so that your health insurance keeps getting better and better every year.
The less you spend on unnecessary stuff,the more money you are already saving.That money can be used for something like a down payment for a home quite early in your career. So that’s why saving only helps talking about money is never easy. It can come off as harsh, crude, very Golddigger rubbish, but it’s a practical necessity and it’s very important.
Partners end up sharing the burden of debts. Families are torn apart because of impossible credit card bills, homes, get mortgaged due to horrible money habits and poor business decisions. It takes one bad decision to destroy. But small, good habits together every day will help you build a better and stronger relationship. And also a bigger bank balance.
There’s a necessary disclaimer:
I am not a financial advisor. And what I say is not to be taken as professional advice, sharing what I want to tell my daughter about.
Resources on the Website you will love:
Talking Money with My Daughter: Teaching the Value of Money