How to win friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie, is part of the syllabus at many business schools.
Its among the list of top books to read if you are starting a biz.I started reading it because self improvement is my favourite life goal.But reading it once is not enough .Thats why I am writing the book summary in small bits .Just the way I am revising it.
To call it a biz book ,is like calling the Indian Ocean a pond.Its a life book.
Must read if you want to be great at whatever you do .
The book is only 275 pages .But its not just words.The quotes,experiences leap out of the pages and get embedded in your brain.It’s best if you read the book. But if not I will try to help.
The book is divided into 4 parts with important lessons.
My book summaries are for those who dont have time to read
Part 1 is about fundamental techniques in handling people.
Part 1 has 3 lifehacks :
# Lifehack 1
“Don’t criticize condemn or complain.Nobody likes being criticized because it hurts the ego”
is Dale Carnegie’s favourite advice.
Often you must have seen people get aggressive or adamant when we rebuke them.Even my 4 year old ,little girl is more difficult to manage if scolded publicly.So just like you the other persons ego has his self worth .You just cannot ever hurt it.Never.Ever.
Atleast if you want him to do what you want!
People like to be publicly praised and if criticism if needed,best to do it in private.
This is a very difficult thing to keep in mind .But what is there in life except trial and error.
Give honest and sincere appreciation.
The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated .
History shows people like belonging to groups,gangs .Because it makes them feel wanted,appreciated,needed.Words of appreciation is music to the ear.
But can you always give sincere praise?If not its better not to say anything.Each of us are capable of understanding insincerity intuitively.
Appreciation comes from the heart, so it rings true
.False flattery is just lip service.
Arouse in the other person an eager want.
Example :The festival discounts on amazon!
They know how much people need to save money.But really want to shop.So they give us what we want and need.
People who can put themselves in the other people’s place have empathy.They generally can get people to agree to their plans because they know what people want.
In business and in life ,its important to know what others want.Because very rarely does anyone care about what you want.To get ahead in life you need to know the first.To be happy in life you need both.
Tell me what you think about these lifehacks in the comments below.
Read also the other parts of the book summary