Thoughts on one life to live

Serendipity or Destiny :I became a doctor

By Dr.Amrita Basu(MBBS,MS) on January 27, 2017 37

I grew up in a typical Bengali middle class family.

With wants and needs being finely balanced by the monthly salary .

Though my parents were both working ,it was my mom who managed all household expenses.

My father’s salary mysteriously always found other uses.It was never spent on the household needs or our requirement for school stuff.

It wasn’t that he was a bad father .It was just that he didn’t care enough.

He suffered from occasional bouts of depression and swinging manic phases.

I didn’t know what I hated most !

When he wouldn’t get out of bed or when he would come home at midnight.

Either way my mom had it tough.

Bringing up two daughters single handedly.

Luckily we had plenty of guardian angels looking over us .

That’s why we survived.

We survived our home almost being auctioned by the credit card company.

We survived social humiliation.

We survived heartbreaks.

I always believed in God .

I always believed I would one day help people .How I was helped,I remembered .

I remembered all the time.Forgetting it, would make me weak.

That’s why I knew, I wanted to be a doctor.

Do you call that Serendipity?

Destiny or Serendipity? Destiny smiles on those who work hard.So if good things happen ,remember someone's always watching over you — Destiny or Serendipity? Destiny smiles on those who work hard.So if good things happen ,remember someone’s always watching over you

Being a doctor, life is different.

You see the pain ,the suffering ,the helplessness and hopelessness of so many people.

Doctors have to maintain a clinical distance and still have empathy .That’s a tough balance.

By embracing the pain and helplessness of my childhood as blessings I have carved out my life.It’s no use protecting children from sadness,conflict, rejection and dejection.It’s no use altering reality .It’s definitely no use lying to them.

Because ultimately we are the sum total of our experiencs .Good ,bad,ugly and the truly horrible!

I think it was destiny and serendipity that I have the emotional strength to practice being a doctor.

Because if life was easy ,I don’t think I could have made it this far.

I am thankful for being a doctor .I am thankful for this opportunity to make a difference.

Because I believe

The blessed are helped

The truly blessed can help.

Do you believe in destiny ?

Comment below to let me know .

Writing this for the Blogchatter prompt Serendipity .

UBC day 29

How my life changed : Love of learning

By Dr.Amrita Basu(MBBS,MS) on January 24, 2017 6

Saraswati puja is next week .I have been a fan of the Goddess Laxmi -Saraswati sisters for as long as I could remember.
When I was growing up,my family had plenty of financial troubles.

Luckily my maternal uncles were angels.
They ensured me and my sister had no troubles when it came to studies and buying books.

Learning is a journey. Life and learning is limitless .The only thirst that should never quench is the love of learning.

When I look back I realize the dots always connect. If you want to learn something, do something, the Universe helps you ,guides your way.
Even when the odds look impossible, miracles happen.
My love for reading,of learning new skills ,of trying to make that a way of getting some extra cash dates back to the year 2000.
I had cleared the state medical entrance and joined Calcutta Medical College.
This was a dream come true.
The best part my results ,it made me a good candidate for giving tuitions at home.
My sister was a doll.She publicised my academic results among her friends and herself did so well ,that most of my students were actually her friends.
I am thankful to all the people who helped support me during the time I needed it most.
My friend Rukmini asked her Mom to let me tutor her little sister .Those little acts of kindness let me earn nicely to support the little pocket money I received.
My mom had good financial sense and helped open up my Public provident fund account and savings account? very early to help me keep my earnings.
I am going back in time to remember all the good people who helped me learn.Learn to be a doctor .Learn to help .
Learn to be a good person.

Working on learning and working on being good is a lifelong journey.
But very few people even start.That way my love of learning put me on the path to the best thing in life.
That’s learning new things.

Linking up with #ClickandBlogAStory with Dew ,Geethica and Zainab .

UBC Day 24

Feminist & being a “woman “:Is this an oxymoron ?

By Dr.Amrita Basu(MBBS,MS) on January 16, 2017 39

Feminism means wanting equality for women .Till I was a mother, I was a vocal feminist.But once I became a mom to a tiny pink bundle of joy, I realized some truths.

All employers while recruiting women, keep one thing in mind. Whether you are going to have a child anytime soon, or are a mom.

Whether they will actually say so, will depend on the category of MCP they belong to.Men will always forget they have a mom, while disapproving child care leave to women.If you are a woman and don’t want a family , you will be judged.

Yes, you will be judged by everybody. Male,female ,young ,old.They will wonder why?They will check out how you look and behave.

Do men face this?Sure they do.But not in the same way, right?

If you are married they will judge you.If you have children and want to spend time with them, they will judge.

If you leave them at daycare they will judge.Plus you will also judge yourself. If you are ambitious and want to do well ,they will cast aspersions on your ability to manage home and family.

If you are highly educated ,they will doubt your matrimonial suitability.

Now the question arises who are they?

They are not just men.There are plenty of women whose daily pass time include, dissecting other women.Bringing down their moraleTearing apart their dreams and aspirations.

There are also men, who understand what you are going through. Men who help .Not because you are a pretty female, but because you are a human being who is asking for help.

As a humanist ,I want to be a good doctor and help the people who need me.

I want to be a wonderful teacher for my students.I want to be my hubby’s partner in all his battles .

I also want to do all this, with my little girl happy , well cared for and growing up to be a strong woman.

The only way to teach her to be strong is to be strong myself. A difficult job.But one that must be done

During my life here on earth,I have befriended men and women.I married my best friend .Another veryclose friendd is a man.In fact this friend is my hubby’s friend too for the last 17 years.

With men like these I have realized one thing .They are good human beings .

I never could tolerate chauvinism .Neither could I tolerate the damsel in distress thing.But sometimes in life we may be women needing help.

That’s when we need men /women in shining armours to save us.I have a few such wonderful men and women in my life.If God wanted all to be equal,he would have made us so.Once he made men ,God realized for any life to make a difference, it needed the power to create miracles.

That’s when he made women.

[bctt tweet=”Women have the extra bit of magic that men don’t have .” username=”misra_amrita”]

I want to be a woman, who can have all the rights she wants.As a child and young woman equal rights will do.

But as a mom I want to have more rights .Special rights .Yes I want it all!That’s what I would do if I had superpowers. Because if women stop being moms, humanity will perish.

Your thoughts on this ? Comment below to let me know.

Life is a journey

By Dr.Amrita Basu(MBBS,MS) on January 9, 2017 11

Life is a journey

where survival depends on adaptation to sudden detours

-Amrita

When I read Bushra and Zainab’s prompt this week,I knew I had to share this .

I was always a confident child (a confident woman too).

Growing up books gave be the power to help choose right from wrong.Books also helped me fire up my imagination. The downside of confidence was ,I didn’t take opposition to my thoughts very easily.

But life’s journey teaches you all your lessons.

God was kind to me .He helped me stand up again after falling badly. But I learnt one of my most precious lessons

The sudden break in my journey was enlightening. The people I met due to the detours made me who I am today.

Every bump in life’s journey ,should be accepted with grace.

Because that bump may throw you into the lap of divine opportunity.

Living in Malda I suffered homesickness. I have always been a city girl and the small town seemed impossible to love.

But this busy little town with no AC movie theatre ,no shopping malls and very little in terms of entertainment, is a blessing.

I am able to give a lot if time to my little girl.I have the most gorgeous balcony garden ,which my in laws water when I am travelling. I can blog in peace .

The most difficult life decision has been an amazing blessing in disguise.

I am still occasionally frustrated with the small irritations and lack of certain amenities .

But the good and the bad go hand in hand.

Life’s journey is more fun when we can enjoy the good and throw away the bad.

The only 2 things in life which are constant is “change” and “death”.

When we accept these truths life is easier.

Adaptation is an essential quality for survival .Are you upto it?

Comment below to let me know .

If I had the power:#WedShadow

By Dr.Amrita Basu(MBBS,MS) on December 9, 2016 1

With great power comes great responsibility .When I wrote about being a superwoman , I told you a list of things I wanted to do.

But what if I had one power?

Only one .

What would I do ?

The world online and offline ,everywhere there seems to be a lot of hatred .

Who is to blame ,is anyone’s guess.

The discussion itself can lead to vitriolic debate.

But is hate a good emotion ?

Is it a positive emotion?

Is it a productive emotion?

Does it help anyone?

Do you know anybody who has lived happily ever after with hatred?

The answer to all this, is an emphatic no.

But we still can’t help it.

It’s an empty emotion.

A black hole.

The more you feed it ,bigger it becomes.

The cycle of hatred is self perpetuating .

If you don’t stop it in its track ,you get sucked into the vortex of hatred.

If I had the power I would remove hatred from the world.

WritING the post for #WedShadow with Ruchie and Romila,

Prayers for our soldiers & duties we have

By Dr.Amrita Basu(MBBS,MS) on December 1, 2016 1

It takes a special kind of heart and mind to face your worst fear everyday.

It takes even more courage to leave your loved ones for your duties ,not knowing when you will meet again.

7 Soldiers who lost their lives in Nagrota army base terrorist attack.

3 Indian Army officers died when a helicopter on a routine sort crashed at Sukns in Darjeeling.

In both cases soldiers lost their lives.

That’s the unfortunate part of their jobs.

Praying for their soul is the least we can do.

May God help and support their families.

Soldiers give their lives as duties.But many people have problem standing up when the National Anthem plays . These same people are very aware about their rights too.

The situation is so silly that an Apex court needs to remind people of their duties.

Rights and duties are two sides of the same coin.

If you are not comfortable with the duties,dont expect the rights.Civics and our constitution is pretty clear on both the topics .

What goes around comes around.

Life is simple.

Let’s learn from the brave soldiers who brave all odds to protect our ungrateful backs.

Let’s make them proud .

Our “thank you by words and deeds may just be what they need now.

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Serendipity or Destiny :I became a doctor